4 Weeks Left!

So many things to discuss.

1st, the most important news that has been weighing on my mind for a long time now. I QUIT MY JOB. Yes, I did. I never thought I'd be the type of person to walk away from a job, especially when things are like they are, but I did it. A lot of hemming and hawing went into this but I am so glad the decision is made. I am going to pursue a totally different career path and probably lifestyle. I'm going to become a certified yoga instructor with the intention of opening a studio in Vancouver, WA. A change like this has always been in the back of my mind and the timing was right to make it happen now. I have been really unhappy with my job for a long time for many reasons. It became evident recently that things were not going to change anytime soon. All of these factors in play made it a lot easier to make this choice. My last day is either 4/2 or 4/9, but I'm shooting for 4/2. I'm transferring all of my projects to other people which has also been rough. Even though I put my notice in over a week ago I am still waking up in the middle of the night worrying about work. I really hope this ends, and soon.

The best part of this is that the teacher training doesn't start until the fall so I am going to have a lot of free time between now and then. I'm the type to worry about everything and one of my fears is that I'll become a lazy, bored, overweight alcoholic. That's not very positive is it? The good part is that in my 32 years I've learned that I actually do have control over everything and there is NO WAY I'd let any of that happen. In my spare time I've been writing up lists galore and it is helping me look forward to it.

There is no time in my life I think I'd be able to follow this path. Soon we'll have kids crawling all over us (maybe 2 years or so?) so the time for this change is now. Reading this article helped push me toward my decision. There are a lot of other factors that helped justify this as well so if you're struggling with the same decision let me know if you want to talk more! I am very fortunate to have saved up money and to be able to lean on my husband, who is 100% supportive and on board. I wouldn't have put us in this position if we couldn't manage financially.

I am really excited about the yoga path and have a lot of ideas. I'm planning out what I will do over the summer to prepare for the training (practicing a LOT, learning & reading a LOT) but I am also planning beyond that. I'm going to write a business plan for the potential studio and work on outreach stuff too. I really want to donate teaching to those that don't have access to it. I'll share some of those thoughts as I move forward and probably look for feedback. There are two local yoga NFPs and I'm hoping to work with one of them over the summer. I also want to find a studio that I could volunteer at so I can learn more of the business side of running a studio. If anyone reading this has resources that you could point me to that would be awesome. I'm talking yoga teachers, studio owners, etc. I'm trying to talk with everyone I can right now, doesn't matter where they are located.

There is so much more I could ramble on about but that's about the gist of it.

I AM SO EXCITED.

On to training. Boston is 4 weeks from tomorrow! Training has been going so-so lately and I've cut a lot of runs short. I'm just so tired. And sick of it. I started feeling sick a few days ago and was worried how that would affect my 20 miler today. For the first time I planned to go out relatively early and just get it over with. I ended up leaving at 10:40 after a breakkie of coffee and 2 pieces of french toast with peanut butter and syrup. Damn good meal. (I have also been eating like a hog lately and loving it, despite its disgustingness.)

I set out with no goals other than to not have to call someone to pick me up. I went out easy so my legs would get tight early. Lately they've been starting to hurt really early, like mile 7 or 8. I end up pushing through it and generally it goes away, or I get used to it, but it sucks. And it worries me. I'm always worried.

I'm not going to go through all of the splits but I was basically all over the board from 8:20s to low 9:00s. I ended up averaging 8:35 which I felt was quite impressive for where I am in my training. I was expecting to go a lot slower. And it felt...okay. Like, yes, it was hard, how couldn't it be, but it was not worse than shorter long runs and actually better than any of my long runs so far. I'm not even really tired now? Isn't that weird and awesome? When I was nearing home (I did a 20 mile loop from home) I had to stop at a light and saw I had 0.7 miles left. I felt like I had a lot left in my tank so decided to go fast until I hit 20. I ended the run with a 7:30 mile. TAKE THAT!

I don't know who I'm talking shit to - perhaps my persona that doesn't think I'm good enough, smart enough and doggone it no one likes me! So take that you fool.

Babies, Doobies and (of course) Nancy Kerrigan

I just ran 12 miles in cold pouring rain on a THURSDAY. I don't know why but doing it on Thursday makes it feel even more nonsensical. My fingers a numb and swollen and making it hard to type. I am so glad this run is done. I've gotten in the habit of skipping at least one important run per week and so far I've done all right.

Well, ok. Yesterday I had a 10 mile VO2 Max run that I was promising myself I'd skip. But I made a plea bargain w/myself and did the 5 x 1000 repeats on the track and ran home. So I only ran 5.6 miles but i still did the speedwork. It all worked out very well and both parties were pleased.

I do have an injury that's been nagging me and going up and down on the pain scale. I have a shin split in my inner left ankle that smarts like the dickens. (That is a term that my Wisconsin grandma would have used.) Last night for about 5 minutes it felt like someone was taking a baseball bat to it. It was ridiculous. Then immediately it went back to a level 2 pain. I don't get it. Anyway, I'm trying to ice it at least once/day and just ignore it. Isn't that how we're supposed to deal w/injuries?

Tomorrow is d-day and I really need to smoke a doobie to calm myself down. Too bad I don't smoke doobies. I guess I'll opt for a glass of wine.

Is it just me or is everyone getting pregnant right now? I am so happy for everyone but I think I'm still in denial about growing up. When will this end?

PS - my run tonight was at a decent pace. I don't know the total average but I'd guess 8:20? I felt strong and good despite the cold and damp.

That's it for now. Biyee.

6 weeks left?

Wow - time has been ticking on by with barely a moment to stop and take inventory here. Actually, posting here has been one of the many To Dos HOMH (hanging over my head). Just a few moments ago I took an inventory on all of the things hanging over my head and RIFBAM (reasons I feel bad about myself) and it wasn't pretty. I won't share it with you!

I have had some good runs lately but did miss a big one last week - my tempo run...what was I thinking?? So I feel bad about that but only marginally compared to other stuff in my life. My 18 miles today went well and I finished in 2:37, which is an 8:43 pace. I've been doing a lot of yoga lately too which is great, but I feel a little bit like its kicking my ass and slightly hindering my running. And then the running is hindering the yoga. My legs shake in some of the poses because they're so damn tired. My body won't twist like it should because everything is so tight. My masseuse that I used in prior marathon training was injured in a car wreck (sorry Kurt!) and I haven't had the chance to find someone new. I need to get worked out! I might do a spa massage this Friday if I'm feeling fancy.

But anyway, I'm definitely taking it a lot slower this training cycle. Just trying to focus on having fun and not being too serious. And to not stress out about not being as fast. And also being fatter. See? What is wrong with me? No stress....who cares about a few #s. Perspective FGS. So, anyway, I want to have fun during the marathon and as Jen says, just run my victory lap. I'm not going to requalify and who knows if I'll even get close to a 3:40. I do take the training somewhat seriously - how can you not in order to commit to so many miles/week?

There are some things that I've been quiet about recently that I hope to be able to open up about soon. (Sorry, not pregos.) I've been trying to meditate and make decisions on big things and it all may be coming to fruition soon. Stay posted! I think I'm getting my shit in order and that feels good, but it is a bit of a struggle to get there and I'm hoping that ends soon.

Now: the weather. Cause who doesn't like news about the weather? It has been pretty nice here lately and everything is popping out of the ground. We have a glorious cherry tree in front of our house that is blossomed PINK all over right now. It smells great and is pretty amazing. I've been working out my plan for my vegetable garden, even taking some classes to edumacate myself. The downside to buying a house with intensive landscaping is the work. Josh and I spent at least 5 man hours cleaning out and weeding a small section of it on Saturday and it honestly feels like we got no where. We did generate a tightly packed "yard waste" container provided by the city. Like, the huge ones. So we must have made somewhat of a dent? The best discovery were the several petite dog turds that lay exactly in the center of some of our decorative grasses. You know the kind that fluff out from the middle. The little bastard seems to have taken a liking to the comfort of those grasses and his point has been made. It is kind of funny but also really GD annoying!

I'm just babbling now and not even going to re-read for edits. Sorry folks! Time is of the essence. Have a great week....

eedo